কিউরিয়াস কেস অফ মাইন্ডোলজী-৫

জানিনা ব্রেইন এন্ড কগনিটিভ সায়েন্সে অ্যাডমিশন পেয়েও আমি পড়তে পারবো কিনা! বাঙ্গালী সমাজে কেউ ছেলেটাকে নিজের স্বার্থ ত্যাগ করতে বলে না, কিন্তু মেয়েটাকে  বলতে কেউ ১৫ মিনিটও দেরী করে না। 

Curious case of mindology-4

Today is my marriage anniversary. The candle is still glowing here. I am here to warm up... oh sorry, some thing else is still awake with me, the clock is ticking and ticking. I am actually not here to write anything, just want to note down a random thought. I have reached in such a state of my life when I have nothing more to ask from anyone. I have nothing more to say too. 

Curious case of mindology-3

It is a frustrating blog. Frustration about not being able to touch my dream. My applications for PhD in Neuroscience admission are under review and I am hopeless about getting any scope. The reason for being hopeless in my Undergraduate discipline (I regret for my bachelor degree from BUET and Mechanical Engineering), Low CGPA in UG and most pathetically, not having sufficient mathematical courses. We got worst mathematics teachers in the best engineering university of Bangladesh. I worked so hard in my last two years of master degree to recover all these drawbacks, still those are matters and I am fearing I am going to miss my chances of being accepted in elite universities. I am dreaming of such PhD track which is not available in slightly lower category universities, had no other choice for applying other than those elite universities, and eventually passing days of frustration. Most pathetic thing is, I am stuck in my own jail. I do not know what else can be done to remove the effects of my BUET life. I never wanted to be an engineer, always dream to be a scientist, want to work with neural mechanisms, want to understand how I think...

Sometimes, I feel like breaking everything around me, sometimes I cry for my pathetic past. I want to move forward, but when I see my past is narrowing my way in future, I cant feel anything but helplessness.